Fasting: Master Cleanse

So yeah, you heard me right, I'm fasting. I'm doing what's called the "Master Cleanse," and I'm going to keep it up for ~10 days. Basically, I've stopped eating, and the only two things I consume are: water, and spicy lemonade. I drink about 10 cups of the lemonade a day, which consists of water, fresh-squeezed lemons, maple syrup, and cayenne pepper. The syrup helps keep blood sugar up so I don't lose energy, and it's the primary source of calories (roughly 1000/day). The cayenne pepper stimulates metabolism. And the lemon juice helps with peristalsis, particularly in the colon.

The idea with the fast is that by limiting caloric intake you trigger the body to enter a super-healing mode. The body does not actually cannibalize healthy tissue until somewhere in day 10-40 of the fast; during a fast, in order to get its needed proteins, fats, etc, the body consumes waste already in the body. So that includes dead and dying cells, fat cells (woohoo!), and various other miscellaneous "toxins", as the crazies like to call them. The body also works to expel all toxins from the body. During the fast most people gain a bit of energy, and tend to feel fantastic. Some people experience symptoms of cold or flu, which are temporary. Almost everyone experiences coated tongues and heinous feces, but by the end of the fast all "toxins" are purged, tongues are uncoated, and feces is basically just mucous. [Ew!] Overall the body slims down, heals itself, and purges itself of waste and toxins.

So why on god's green earth would I do this, you ask? Good question. I'm not entirely sure I've got it figured out myself, although it feels like the right thing to do. Hehehe. No, there's more to it than that. I've actually known a number of people through the years who swear by it, my friend Tiffany included. But the impetus for me doing it now was a lunch conversation I had on Friday with Dana and Peter at work. We talked about all sorts of work-inappropriate things, but colon health was one of them, and the Master Cleanse came up. When I mentioned it during Book Club the next day at Tiffany's, she pulled out several big-ass books about cleansing bodily symptoms, including one with colon pics. That one sold me. I mean, I love my colon, and that picture of a sagging and ill colon scared me straight (so to speak).

So what am I trying to get out of this?

1. Clean and healthy colon. It's not called the Master Cleanse for nothing.
2. Test of my self-discipline. I love food, for god's sake!!!!!
3. Resetting of my cravings and tastes. Tho this is more out of intellectual curiosity.
4. Kick-start on weight loss (I need to drop maybe 20 lbs total to be my ideal leanness). I expect this'll drop 5-10 of those lbs. Though everyone says not to do it for the weight loss component!

What freakish side-effects am I expecting?

1. Weird toxin expulsions in my mouth (coated tongue, bad breath).
2. Acne flare-up, though this was already in progress (woohoo for being 30 with zits!).
3. Horrid monstrosities in the toilet. [The sign of a cleansed colon!]
4. Lots and lots and lots of peeing.

I started on Saturday afternoon at Tiffany's, at about 4pm. I made my first pitcher of lemonade around 6pm same day, and haven't looked back since (it's midnight Monday). I'll do an update in the next post.